Posts in category: Resilience

Entitlement to voice suffering

Entitlement to voice suffering

Suffering is part and parcel of life. It is only natural that we seek to ameliorate our suffering, to ease ourselves through the difficult times. Many of us have difficulty voicing our suffering. We engage in what I call comparative dismissal. “There is always someone...
Stability amidst change

Stability amidst change

Change is constant. And inevitable. But we also need stability. We are creatures of comfort. Change can be invigorating in short bursts, but we can only tolerate a certain amount of change-stress. Stability is the salve for change-stress. It is necessary for our...
What we pay attention to

What we pay attention to

I posted this aphorism on my Facebook feed a while ago which sparked a discussion with a friend. The following is a summary of the clarity that resulted from that discussion. Thanks Douglas! The thoughts and feelings we pay attention to are the thought and feelings we...
Just hiring diversity is not enough

Just hiring diversity is not enough

Diversity is more than just hiring diverse people in your organisation. If everyone in your organisation is unwilling, or don’t know how to connect to each other, then your organisation is no more diverse beyond the politically-correct stock photos on your...
Tech mags: from news to guidebooks

Tech mags: from news to guidebooks

I haven’t bought a computer magazine for over 15 years now. The last time I flipped through one was more than five years ago. So it was interesting to find myself standing in front of a rack of them at a newsagents recently. Computer magazines used to be my primary...
How to lie in a post-truth world

How to lie in a post-truth world

In this age of post-truth politics and alternate facts, lying had never been more in the public eye. We see it in politics and in marketing; in the form of pronouncements, media releases, editorials, and of course, advertising. Here are eight mechanisms I see being...
Give as much as you take

Give as much as you take

Give as much as you take. (If in doubt, give a little more.) Balancing our needs and their needs, in a fair and reasonable way, is important for our wellbeing. This is perhaps more important now than ever before, given the world seems to be increasingly about taking....
Five self-awareness lessons from the 2016 US elections

Five self-awareness lessons from the 2016 US elections

Judge others by their actions, not their words. A candidate can say anything they want before the election, then change their mind after. They can even do a completely reversal, committing to the opposite with as much conviction as the prior position. Promises can be...
Post-traumatic growth

Post-traumatic growth

The Surprising Benefit Of Going Through Hard Times is a positive article on thriving after traumatic events. A common traumatic event many working professional face is being the target of a manager, colleague, business partner who has APD (anti-social personality...
Some problems are insoluble

Some problems are insoluble

Let’s define solved as – the problem has be dealt with, or cleared up, in such a way that it has gone away and not likely to occur again any time soon, or ever again. Not all problems are solvable by this definition. Because to solve it would require one or more...
The importance of being healthy selfish

The importance of being healthy selfish

A core aspect of elevating ourselves is learning healthy selfishness. Healthy selfish is why we must put on our own oxygen masks first, before helping others. In every situation, we can examine the following: What can I do in response? How can I learn from this?...
Action-Impact gap

Action-Impact gap

The Action-Impact gap lies between our awareness of having done or said something, and the realisation of that action’s impact on others. When we have a large gap, we act without realisation of our actions. We may not even be aware of our actions. As our...
The unemployable skillset

The unemployable skillset

Traditional employment methodologies and processes seem to be increasingly falling behind the reality of work. The jobs that are most safe going forward naturally require skills referred to as the “three bottlenecks to automation:” creativity, social intelligence, and...

If you truly feared failure…

This is an interesting reframe: “People who think they fear failure have got it wrong. They really fear success. If you truly feared failure, you’d be very successful.” — Barbara Sher in I Could Do Anything If I Only Knew What it Was. The fear...
When strong emotions override communications

When strong emotions override communications

Strong emotions can get in the way of constructive dialogue and communication. They can be triggered in either party in the dialogue. And they can spread – each party can pick up the other’s strong emotions. Strong emotions interrupt our ability to think...
Constructive dream or escapist fantasy?

Constructive dream or escapist fantasy?

Are you sitting down? That dream job you have in your head may be an escapist fantasy. It may not be constructive. You may not be happier if you achieve it. And it may be getting in the way of you discovering your real dream. This can be a really confronting and hard...
Engaging the brain to help the heart

Engaging the brain to help the heart

When we are caught up in our emotions, it can be very hard to interrupt that inner turmoil. That’s the problem with emotions – they can be so amorphous and sticky. They get into everything. Gum up the workings of our brains. Just letting the feelings flow on...
Pragmatism an undervalued strength

Pragmatism an undervalued strength

Pragmatism seems to be somewhat undervalued these days. And yet it is a powerful antidote to the plethora of fads and trends promising easy fixes and quick answers to every aspect of our existence: how we eat, work, think, feel and play. At the end of the day, surely...
Ideals vs perfectionism

Ideals vs perfectionism

I have on a few occasions heard this said with derision and disdain: “Ideals (and values) just hold us back.” I think a lot of the time this is because they have confused Ideals with Perfectionism. Ideals give us a grand vision to strive towards. There is no illusion...
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